At the beginning of my journey here -- I was "disappointed" that I did not know this information earlier in my journey -- OK -- I was complaining -- bitching-- being negative. . .I admit it.
As I got further into the journey, I find myself being totally wrong -- again and again -- there is a saying -- when the student is ready, the teacher will show up. I look at the wonderful Parelli teachers I have had over the years -- where was this student? I don't know -- I only know that new things have NEVER come easy to me -- but I have lots of tenacity. ( In college, I had to read everything three times -- go to class, take notes, copy the notes again, read it again and again. . . This is no different, but this time it is about me, my body, my horse and my mind. . .wow.)
Tomorrow Fanny and I work on FREESTYLE -- I am MAKING my HURRY UP self slow down, go back to the basics -- Eyes, bellybutton, leg, rein. . . the four phases-- and then there are the phases within the phases -- but I won't go in to that here.
The last four days I have been on the brink of tears -- I could have cried at a moments notice. I wanted to blame everyone else for MY inadequacies. (I wasn't the only one in this state of mind during our journey with our horses. ) I know that I am assertive and sometimes aggressive. But, I love my horse. OK-- Fanny knows my intention, but. . .
This is a great journey during this BOOTCAMP -- but not an easy one -- keep Fanny in your thoughts and prayers -- and pray that I might be the partner she deserves.
jo
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